PRE-nursing: Step 0.

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Last month, I decided I was going to chase my dreams.

I spent this month researching and honestly, trying to find reasons to not follow through. Reasons why I shouldn’t. Reasons why I can’t. I know that they will always seep into my head as I continue on this journey – but at one point I decided to stop.

I wasn’t stopping to give up, but I wanted to stop creating a cloud of doubt.

A few weeks ago, I applied to National University and literally emailed my advisor a couple of days later to cancel my application.

That cloud of doubt was heavy and dense.

A couple of days ago, I went to meet my adviser and discuss my goals in person.

I resubmitted my application. I submitted my transcripts. I submitted a letter requesting provisional acceptance – I am transferring in with an incredibly low gpa (I think it’s about a 1.43, but I won’t know for sure until they matriculate me). I also, declared a major – which is is not nursing but my stepping stone.

I left my appointment incredibly giddy, scared and exhilarated.

I likely will not take my first course until July, but until that date I decided I will focus on organizing my life – work desk, my room, set up my upcoming study space, old documents, purge my closet, and figure out my finances.

If all goes according to plan, and I get accepted into the nursing program – I know that I will need to quit my job and become a full time student. They said the nursing schedule is Monday through Saturday from 8 am to ‘who knows’ pm. You can be set for an 6 hour clinical, but as in all healthcare, you might be let out early or be held there for another 6 hours.

I’m not sure where along the road I fell off my debt free journey but I know I will need to really focus on it so I can cut as much debt as I can before Nursing so that while nursing I will not only have less expenses but hopefully will have a comfort bubble to help me throughout.

I’m pretty sure I rambled through a lot of that. My mind started jumping with excitement about all the things I get to check off my list in anticipation.

Gahh!!!

National University - pre nursing student
(Instagram Post.) If there is one thing I’ve been transparent about it’s my journey with mental health and through a past abusive relationship. Neither of which compare to the shame I feel in that I could never succeed through college. Lol. (Sarcastic lol. The laugh and cry through face 😬 lol.) I dropped out of Cal Poly Pomona after my first year, to chase a destructive relationship. I enrolled at a community college and I’ve been bouncing around ever since. I was even disqualified to the point I can’t EVER go back. Again, 😬 lol. But I realized, it’s hard for me to follow through and persevere if I have no real desire in the outcome. I’m tired of thinking in terms of my reality, I want to build up to my Goal. & I finally figured it out. And not a day too soon. Or late. I guess, it was all in His Will and His timing. So here I am. Furiously chasing after the dream, I hid buried away about more than 10 years ago. (Also, yes, I’m old af.) 🥂
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